Meet Bill Wilder

Bill Wilder, M.Div., M.A., LMHC

Licensed Mental Health Therapist

Bill Wilder has been a practicing mental health therapist for 20 years and has an extensive experience working in a variety of mental health settings. Bill received a Masters of Family Systems Therapy and a Master of Divinity with a specialization in Internal Family Systems therapy-Level 2 training. Bill have worked has over 8 years experience doing intensive in home therapy along with 8 years as an outpatient therapist at Wake Forest Baptist Hospital. Bill has been the owner and therapist at Wilder Wellnes Center doing therapy and conducting qualitative research creating a new paradigm for a new approach to complement traditional psychotherapy.

Bill is a pioneer creating the world’s first therapy center utilizing cold and hot hydrotherapy to unlock primitive intelligence inside of people alongside an assessment system informed by the best of traditional and unconventional approaches to therapy. Bill founded Wilder Wellness Center, LLC to provide therapy services and research on creating new solutions for the current mental health crisis. Bill’s specialty is in anxiety, depression, couples therpay, teenagers, family dynamics, mid life identity realignment and addiction recovery.

Bill’s Wilder’s Background Story

While growing up, I always wanted to be a good boy and to not fail or upset people. I learned not to trust my own intuition and to put my own needs and wants on the back burner.  By smiling a lot, I would hide my true feelings of sadness.  I thought that if I gave enough and love enough, I would be rewarded.

I created a checklist of what I needed to do to feel better on this inside, all by the age of 23: get a college degree, get married, land a job with high status.  After checking off each item on the checklist, I felt even more disappointed and suffocated by my life choices, but I kept pushing forward believing “life is a battle” and suffering through thinking societal systems and relationships were normal.  I pushed and pushed.

At the ripe age of 30, my check list had failed to satisfy, and I realized subservient fear and staying stagnant was no longer worth the comfort and security that it provided. So, I left my comfort zone and started a 12-year journey of taking all of my education and training as a Psychotherapist, Philosopher, and Theologian and put together a simplified map for the human psyche. This map helped me understand why I had made so many erratic and impulsive decisions in my 30’s, and I discovered that I had been suppressing my voice and my will in the name of pleasing and giving to others. I realized the limits of the current approaches through my Dual Master’s Degree in Psychology and Religion, and the need for a more comprehensive and historical understanding of the human psyche. I was hungry to stop feeling lifeless and restless in my relationships and career, and I discovered some remarkable new discoveries of the human psyche as I went along my journey.

Through my academic studies of history, I discovered that no approach to personal growth incorporated the study of history and the humanities into creating a model for transformation. As I combined these alternative academic perspectives with the power of giving a voice to my ‘primitive instincts’ and experiencing the voice of our ancestors that lives within us, I made a startling discovery.  I found that I could actually follow through with my desires and wants instead of being perpetually stuck in a circular pattern of stagnation and regret. I had been both a therapist and in therapy for 17 years, but I was never able to be assertive and realize that it’s okay if I disagree with someone and that I should be able to speak for my anger and express my natural emotions. It was remarkable having a voice and free will and the courage to drive away fear and anxiety. I was waking up the hibernating parts of myself which gave me new energy and allowed vitality flow through me. I couldn’t believe how literally speaking to and finding this ‘primitive instinctual’ part of me took care of a 100 of my issues at once. Finding this was a miracle because now I had a message to share, but I didn’t know how to best help people experience it. Then I discovered cold water immersion, which is a ‘Primitive Instinct’ magnet, and I found that utilizing the cold was the physical experience I needed to actually find, feed and free this part of me in all parts of my life. The cold water was a new teacher who would snap me out of my ‘head’ and get me out of my pattern of self-sabotage and destruction. 

After returning from a winter expedition with Wim Hof, I could no longer do traditional couch-based therapy because I was tired of not having the resources or tools to actually help the people that I was serving in my practice as a psychotherapist. The convergence of 17 years of study and research of creating a new map for the human mind, along with the discovery of the power of cold water and other natural approaches inspired me to take the leap of faith and start a new type of personal growth center. 

The big moment of truth happened one month after I returned from Poland on Feb 20, 2019 as I was in the cold lake meditating. I believe that I received a sign from the universe. Almost like a window of invitation to jump through to another world. I answered “yes” to the question, “Do you want to be this messenger for this truth?” It felt illogical but inherently true so I said yes. At that moment 10 geese swam by me.  I decided my start date would be May 1st. When I signed those papers and got the keys, I moved into what felt like a different Universe. Shortly after that, I was out in Southern California with nothing to do (the growth retreat I planned to attend was cancelled) so I went on a spiritual pilgrimage and ended up at the Lake Shrine temple in LA.  While meditating, I sensed an intuitive message to put in my resignation notice early, so I typed up a resignation letter and sent it in at that moment.  This was the day before the global Covid-19 pandemic shut down much of North America. If I had not followed this prompting, I do not think I would have left the comforts of my job with the hospital.

Instantaneously, I found myself unemployed and responsible for a lease right as the world fell apart. I remember laying on the floor saying, “what have I done?” Then I realized there are only two ways forward; the way of “Faith” or the way of “Fear.” I decided to run into the dark with faith and courage. The Wilder Wellness Center was born because I wanted people to experience this ‘primitive instinct’ that changed my life. Today, I am living a dream that was born out of the cold waters and it is the vision that has become the Wilder Wellness Center.